About
What is Biting News?
Biting News operates from an extensive campus, deep in the woods, far beyond the reach of debt collectors, aggrieved ex-spouses and multiple tax authorities.
Our extensive staff of award-winning reporters, journalists, reprobates, and hacks is forced to work around the clock for your enjoyment. We only hope our ‘journalists’ don’t discover there’s now a minimum wage!
Tell me more!
Biting News is the world’s foremost practitioner of Stopped Clock journalism. That is to say, we pay no attention to the truth and are thus only correct twice a day.
This makes us twice as accurate as MSNBC. And four times more accurate than The New York Times.
“What about CNN,” you ask? We don’t regard CNN as a source of news.
The Biting News Community
As I write this, the Biting News community consists of 10 members and a cat named Gerald. As far as we can tell, only Gerald is literate and this puts us in a bit of a spot.
While our content is erudite and informative, it’s also satirical and absurdist. If you’re looking for informative news, you won’t find it here. Of course, you won’t find it anywhere else either, but that’s not our fault.
We tend to appeal to people who enjoy poking fun at the overly pompous, and taking cheap shots at Democrat shills. If you are the Democratic Party or one of their many shills, you won’t find much to like here.
You’d think our decision to take cheap shots at the totalitarian regime that dominates every institution would get in the way of making money. And you’d be correct. We’re losing money faster than Joe Biden is losing his marbles.
Fortunately, we have a trump card! We at Biting News are also financially illiterate and thus blissfully unaware there is no hope of making any money.
What we do have in abundance is the sort of irrational exuberance that inevitably leads to financial destruction. And we figure many people will pay good money to watch the car crash as it happens. How else does anyone explain Rachel Maddow?
Thus, we conclude, we’re bound to end up coining it. That’s the story we told our bank manager and we’re sticking to it.
Community Guidelines
This community is all about respect. And that respect flows in one direction: from you to us.
For that reason you are required to observe the following compulsory suggestions:
- Free speech is welcome
- Anyone who disagrees with us will be permanently suspended
- The only people who read rules like this are rule-following fascists. We despise such people and thus, you have already been permanently suspended
- Keep conversation respectful and free of personal attacks. Only we are permitted to make personal attacks (we nicked this rule straight out of the Democrat Member’s Handbook)
- British spelling is objectively better. Descent will result in permanent suspension
- The metric system is objectively better. Descent will result in permanent suspension
- Relax, be yourself, and enjoy. That way, we can catch you off guard